Are there different types of mothers? Which type of mother are you?

I’m sure you’ve heard of the Miss Universe question, “What is the essence of a woman?” And the winning answer is always, “The essence of a woman is motherhood”.

But what does it mean? What does it mean to be a mother? What is the essence of a mother’s love?

Do you catch yourself asking, “Am I a good mother?” Or “Am I doing motherhood right?

Let’s discuss this topic today.

The Different Types of Mothers

Different types of mothers

To begin this discussion, let’s talk about the different types of mothers. And if this is the first time you’ve encountered this, I tell you, YES, the different types of mothers exist.
Let’s see here.

The First-time moms

First-time moms are usually the most nervous of all mothers. They don’t know what to do, they are grappling with what needs to be done and how they can be the “perfect mom”.

For sure, they want the best for their children but they don’t know how to do it yet. And they don’t know that being a mom is something innate and instinctive. They haven’t found out that yet.

But they should understand that wanting the best for their children is already a good start. And that motherhood is actually something that has been engraved inside each woman ever since humanity began.

How did you think humans survive? Thanks to moms! (Just kidding. No offense daddies!)

The Stay-at-Home moms

The stay-at-home moms are the most haggard of them all.

Long before feminism and women working has become a thing, there were a lot of stay-at-home moms. And people think that being a SAHM (stay-at-home mom) is the luckiest job there is to be.

Oh, but what most people imagined is far from the real lives of SAHM.

Here’s what people think:

SAHM just takes care of the baby. The only thing they do is bathe, feed, and let the baby sleep, and they are free to do anything the whole day.

Yeah, this is true, if your baby is a doll.

But here’s the reality for SAHM moms.

❤️ Wakes up early in the morning to prepare for everyone.
❤️ Bathes the kids
❤️ Prepares lunch
❤️ Wash the dishes
❤️ Wash the clothes
❤️ Iron the clothes when dry
❤️ Makes sure the baby is not falling off or bumping heads on somewhere or something
❤️ Makes coffee but end up not drinking it because they forgot due to the “busy schedule”
❤️ Want to sleep but afraid that the baby will suddenly wake up so they end up cleaning the house instead while the baby is sleeping
❤️ Prepares dinner before everybody gets home
❤️ Wash the baby when they poop and feed the baby on time
❤️ Barely have time to take a bath or eat or even go to the toilet to pee
❤️ Sleeps later than everybody else to make sure that everything is prepared for the next day

Is this true? Am I exaggerating? Ask any SAHM you know, I’m sure they’ll agree.

No wonder they are always exhausted. Give them a break.

The Working Moms

These are the moms who had to leave their kids at home, at the grace of a babysitter, to help make ends meet. And still, they are judged for not being there for their kids. (Don’t you know it hurts them, too?)

Are they less of a mother for not being there to take care of their kids? Of course not. They have to do what they had to do.

Their kids need diapers, food, good education, a safe place to live in, and clothes to wear.

And if this is the only way that they can provide these for their kids, then they have to do it. Even if it means not being there always with their kids.

And trust me, they already feel guilty about it even without people judging them and telling them off.

Of course, they would want to be there for their kids. They want to be there when their kids are sick or performing in a play. In every parent’s meeting or just dancing in the rain with the kids. Yes, they would want to – but they can’t.

Some of these moms are single moms who can’t lean on anyone else to provide for in the family. And some of them need to work to secure a better future for the kids.

And one thing is for sure – they love their children and they want the best for them and they are doing their best for them. Let’s give them a tap on their shoulders, too.

The Work-at-home Moms

With this pandemic suddenly happening, a lot of moms suddenly found themselves in an odd situation, where they have become work-at-home moms.

And although we can say it has become the common ground, the best of both worlds, the perfect cup of tea (or coffee, if you’re a coffee lover) for mothers, it comes with its own challenges.

These moms are now struggling with setting boundaries between work and motherhood.

Unlike when they are in the office, they can focus on just working, when they are at home, the kids can come in anytime they want. This is especially true now that the kids are not back to school yet.

This affects the ability of the mom to concentrate and focus on work or taking care of the kids. And this is a whole new level of chaos.

Does this make them terrible mothers or terrible workers? I don’t think so.

Trust me, they are trying to do their best for both their family and their company.

And by best, it means sometimes having to work outside their regular hours, just to make up for the time that they are not able to work cause the kids suddenly barged in crying because of their boo-boo.

The Perfect Mother

Oh, wait! They don’t exist. Sorry, nothing to see here. Move on!

The Essence of Being a Mother

Different types of mothers

Although these are different types of mothers, thrust into different situations and different challenges, there is always one thing in common about them.

Mother’s love.

And the essence of a mother’s love is always very evident on the level of sacrifice they can do for their children.

Only mothers can do this:

✨ Make sure the kids can eat even if it means not having any left for them.
✨ Give up sleep when the kids are sick to make sure they will feel better.
✨ Work two jobs just to make sure the kids are provided well and that they get the best education.
✨ Give up their careers to become full-time moms.
✨ Don’t bother about postnatal weight, a healthy baby is more important.
✨ Forgive and forgive and forgive – because they believe the best in their kids
✨ Willing to sacrifice their lives ever since the time they learned they were pregnant (just being pregnant already puts you in at least a 70-30 chance of death)
✨ Ready to accept their kids, no matter who or what they’ve become – because they will always be their kids.

You see, the essence of a mother’s love is that encompassing kindness, unconditional and sacrificial love, and the willingness to lay down their lives for their children.

There are no perfect mothers – we all learn as we go. But that essence of motherhood is inside all of us, women, and it gets activated from the very first time we heard, felt, and saw that little being inside us.

So, to all mothers out there, kudos to you! You are doing your best by aiming the best for your kids. And you can do it!

Proverbs 31: 31 – Honor her for all that her hands have done, and let her works bring her praise at the city gate.

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